How do you pick just one place to start when trying to describe this time of my life? I have no I idea where to start and what to talk about first. There’s so many things I feel like you should know to get the whole picture; like about my long history of head injures, my scarring heartbreaks, my isolated childhood, or my most recent influx of anxiety and stress. Being ghosted just after finally feeling like you’ve found ‘the one,’ falling into deep(er) depression and isolationism, then swooped back up, told everything you’d want to hear, getting your life back on track, to only find out you’ve been cheated on for months, and he now needs you as a character witness to prevent him from going to jail for the next 7-10 years of his life because of her.
Sometimes reality is a bitch.
Sometimes you realize that you’ve been blissfully ignorant for 28 years of your 28-and-a-half year life.
Right now, it’s a Saturday night in the middle of February. Given the context clues I’ve provided above, that would make the current year 2019. My dog, who is five and a half months old now, is laying next to me in my king size bed and soon my kitty cat will join us for the night. She’s quite the snuggle-puss.
I can remember thinking about a year ago, at the start of 2018 just after the new year, that 2017 had probably been the hardest year of my life. New year’s had never been a big thing for me in terms of parties, resolutions, or any sort of sentimental value but on the 2017/2018 new year night it was. I had been struggling with a lot. I still struggle with a lot, that’s why it’s almost midnight and I’m writing to you. That evening was what I felt would be a positive turning point for my life going forward.
Lying to Myself 